Monday, February 25, 2013

Vegetarian and Vegan Oscars Awards

Vegan Awards - Captain  James Tea Cook ‘s  – Top 10 Vegetarian  /  Vegan Oscars 2013

Capt James Tea Cook Oscar Noms

 Ok without further much ado about nothing, celebrities, ladies and gentlemen , Nominations be;


  1. Best Veggie Sausage  - This be so difficult as there be so many juicy delicious meat free alternatives Frys , Redwoods,  Vegusto, Linda McCartney or Goodlife if you like your vegetables more than meat.
  2. Best Meat Free Event – That be easy – it has to be Vegfest UK - but which one?  Brighton ? Bristol or London?
  3. Best Vegan Pirate of The Carob Bean goes to me – Captain James Tea Cook – Hey! I be a Pirate what do you expect?!? 
  4. Best Dairy Free Cheese – Another very difficult choice to be making Do you like it Plantastic Swiss-tastic like Vegusto? Melty Mozarella-ish like Redwoods?  Creamy and Herby like Scheese  from Bute Island foods?  Blue and Roquefort- ish like Redwoods Blue? Or a pour on award winning vegan cheese sauce like Vegusto?
  5. Best Meat Free – Fish Free- Vegan Vegetarian Fish Alternative.  Now see in me heart I’d be urging votes for the fantastic Seafirst Foundation Non-Fish-a-liscious cookbook  but it still be waiting for Tony Bishop-Weston to finish the translation. You be probably thinking  no brainer - what about Redwoods Making Waves  selection with vegan tuna, smoked salmon and  fish n chip shop style  vegan fish steaks but then there be Ikea’s vegan caviar to consider and that Chinese vegetarian supermarket in Milton Keynes 
  6. Best  Dairy Free Vegan Ice Cream  - Once upon a time Swedish Glace be yer only delicious choice, now you have it posh with Razzle Dazzle, even posher with Booja Booja and a plethora of others in between like the Coconut Ice Lollies
  7. Best Vegan beer – Yes you heard me right, BEER! It do be having all sorts of dubious additives in it like bits of fish, battery egg,  dried cow pus, gelatine enough to turn even a pirate’s delicately eclectic constitution. Grolsh ? Becks?  Don’t really be beer do they? Not fit fer pirates. Have a look here or here perhaps or if you are out and about seek out a Sam Smith pub. Personally I’m attached to an Alcohol Free variety to avoid over fertilising me triglycerides.
  8. Best  Vegetarian Full Monty Breakfast  - So far the best I’ve come across on land or sea (apart from me own) be a cafe within a garden Centre called Fairweathers, in Beaulieu, The New Forest.  The Cafe be called Steff’s Kitchen,  you get Baked Beans, Fried Potatoes,  Mushrooms, Tomato,  Wholemeal Toast, Marmite and 2 Frys vegan Sausages and a pot o Teapig. 
  9. Best Vegan Hospital Food  - There don’t be no such thing do there be?  Vegans hardly get sick anyway especially with the things that clog up beds like heart disease, stroke and diabetes, so why should the NHS bother?  If you know better contact these guys. Better Hospital Food
  10. vegan oscars
  11. Best Vegetarian Vegan Celebrity – I be loathe to call any celebrity vegan because there be more pressure on them to be conveinagan as they get into all sorts of social situations where it be plain rude in their world to refuse food, like some poor person on a comic relief trip has cooked up a month’s rations in honour of your visit or you be visiting the Sultan of I’ll cut your head off if you offend me.  But Bill Clinton , Oprah,  Natalie Portman, Chris Martin,  Russell Brand even Ozzie Osborne have all had a good crack at changing perceptions about what a typical vegan be looking like. Let’s be calling them Plantarians for the sake o all those semantic, pedantic,  vegan omega 3 DHA deficient shouty “MY KEYBOARD’S CAPS BUTTON IS STUCK DOWN” Vegan Police cadets out there.